


Dear Teddy...

by melodicMasochist



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Abuse, Homestuck - Freeform, Humanstuck, Lyricstuck, M/M, Melanie Martinez - Freeform, Sadstuck, implied gamzee in rehab, teddy bear, why did i do sads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-13
Updated: 2016-05-13
Packaged: 2018-06-08 03:50:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6837976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melodicMasochist/pseuds/melodicMasochist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternately titled: <br/>"That One Time You Forgot Prose Could Make You Cry Too"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>--</p>
<p>Melanie Martinez-inspired.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear Teddy...

**Author's Note:**

> https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pyuAEmge5p8

**_Stitched you up, put you together, With cotton and feather._ **

Gamzee hobbled himself out of the building, waving a careless goodbye to the center behind him as he redirected the rest of his short attention span back to his just as short boyfriend waiting for him in the parking lot. Karkat himself was leaning against his old, dirty, run-of-the-mill white Toyota Sentra smoking the last of the cigarettes that the neighbor(and his sisters boyfriend, notably) was willing to hand over for the month. He’d been going through them more quickly lately, but with his connections he shouldn’t have a problem getting more anyways. Still oblivious to Gamzee finally returning, he takes another drag and blows it up past his face and into whatever which way the wind decided to carry the smoke today.

“Hey, Karbabe,” Gamzee rasps a mumble at the man, causing ‘Karbabe’ to sputter the rest of his drag and go into a coughing fit of fury, hacking up some transparent goo and spitting it out onto the pavement with a gasp of breath. He then turns back to Gamzee and with an equally raspy voice, if not worse, and the most scolding face he could put on, replied:

“Well, fucking finally you come out of that place, you goddamn stoner. Did you see that-? You almost choked me indirectly. _How the hell do you manage to almost choke someone indirectly??”_ Gamzee waved him off and hopped inside the car, patting his head.

"Miracles, Brother."

Karkat took his boyfriend home and stayed with him overnight, favoring his house over his own cluttered mess. Gamzee, tired from therapy and drugging himself up with his medicine, fell asleep on the couch face-first.

And Karkat was the one to tuck him in with a blanket and steal the bed for himself.

**_Gave you love, put my heart inside you… Oh, what could I do When you started talking in your sleep, Saying things you'd do to me. I didn't care; I wasn't scared. Now I'm finding knives under the sheets, Crumpled photographs of me. I'm in despair, Should I be scared?_ **

Gamzee had picked up the habit of acting out his dreams to something of a disturbing degree; and Karkat knew he wasn’t the most perfect person. He had a record for assault and unpaid charges for public vandilation. His dreams were darker than ever, lately, and it was getting to Karkat's head. Why wouldn't it? His lover was talking in his sleep and discussing among himself the number of ways he could hurt people. But he’d never say that to Gamzee’s face-- that's just asking to tip him off into a fit...

**_Teddy bear, you were my teddy bear._ **

Karkat woke to loud thumping, down the hallways of the house and nearing where he thought the kitchen might be through his fog of sleepiness. As he sat up and lugged the seemingly heavy blankets from his body, he took note of it as coming towards him and suddenly became more awake. Darkness, plus Gamzee who was on the edge of god knows what the last 24 hours? Hell no. Karkat gets up and finds his shoes from back underneath the bedframe and goes to the window to crawl out-- his usual planned escape route.

It’s locked.

Thump-thump. B-tm, thnk, thnk.

Gamzee comes in through the doorway and Karkat freezes, hearing his entry and holding back the stinging cough that was trying to give him away through the dark. Maybe Gamzee had already found him, but to Karkat, the black didn’t change when he screwed his eyes shut or not.

“Karkat…” He debates with himself: _run or face him?_

“What’d you think you’d get away from, motherfucker?” Slowly, Karkat turns around and watches for a few seconds of freedom as Gamzee approaches him and pins him to the floor, sitting on top of his chest and crushing the small body under him. Karkat struggles and pushes against Gamzee’s thighs, gasping out a weak rasp and choking on the cough that came up without his authorization. Gamzee only laughed a deep, disturbing laugh, and sealed his hands around Karkat's head. He pulls up, as if an angry child ripping up it’s stuffed bear with weak seams and a gurgling, broken and old voice box stuck on repeat.

**_You were comforting and quiet, How did love become so violent?_ **

**_Oh Teddy bear, you were my teddy bear._ **

“G-..gah, Gamzee, get off, please, god, get off-!” his eyes water and the cackle in the background of his neck popping just barely out of place goes unnoticed. Usually, Makara’s hands were touching him in other ways. Cuddling, kissing, groping his butt when he was feeling flirty and as stoned as usual. The violent grabbing felt so out of place for Karkat’s memory. So he screams. Then as he was preparing himself to black out, Gamzee inhales deeply and releases him completely. He stands, still breathing hard as he looked down at him for merely a moment before leaving the room and leaving karkat to cough and gasp on the floor.

**_Everything was so sweet, until you tried to kill me._ **

Karkat left as soon as Gamzee had cleared the house and ran home, crying himself back to sleep for the first time in months since Nepeta’s death. A week or so passes with no word from Gamzee and life returns to normal; tangents with his sibling and a long emotional talk with the emotionless, seeking help for the situation where he could. “Is he doing shit to you?” It was only once. “Isn’t that enough to drive you away?” I love him. “There’s better people for you out there.” I know and don't care. Waiting for a call back from a help line, the cell phone on the far wall of the kitchen vibrates, making a hard and loud noise against the stiff plastic of its container. Karkat picks it up, interrupting his nightly writing session on his laptop to answer.

“Hello?”

“Guess who’s all up and at your motherfuckin’ door this fine evening~?”

**_I threw you out, I didn't outgrow you, I just didn't know you._ **

**_But now you're back, It's so terrifying how you paralyze me._ **

**_Now you're showing up inside my home,_ ** **_Breathing deep into the phone,_ **

**_I'm so unprepared._ **

Karkat shakes and lets the phone dangle from its cord on the wall, finding a lightswitch to turn the lights off and pretend that he wasn’t home. However, the lights simultaneously shut down before his fingers could even touch the lightswitch nearest him on the far wall of the kitchen. The fridge, the TV playing Titanic softly on repeat, the ceiling fan in the livingroom, all stopping and turning off, the TV screen black and the fridge ceasing the loud humming. 

**_I'm fucking scared._ **

Now that everything was perfectly silent, Karkat could hear the usually quiet details of sound of the house clearly. The pounding in his ears, the humming of his laptop trying not to crash, and even the barely audible click of the front door opening itself.

**_Oh. Teddy bear, you were my teddy bear._ **

**_Everything was so sweet, until you tried to kill me._ **


End file.
